I used to be a puppet. I was jerked around by the strings of other people’s opinions, my own insecurities, and my fears. I was building my life around what others thought of me. It was stupid, idolatrous, and boring. I was a people pleaser.
Check out what the Apostle Paul told the church in Galatia:
Galatians 1:10 “Obviously, I’m not trying to win the approval of people, but of God. If pleasing people were my goal, I would not be Christ’s servant.”
Paul was not a people pleaser. He told the Galatians that they can’t be people pleaser and be servants of Christ. The two don’t mix. . It seems that we all have a tendency to be people pleasers. Too many of us live for the approval of others when God’s opinion is all that matters! Right?
Here are few simple ways that I’ve overcome being a people pleaser:
*For the more on this article go to my personal blog HERE.
1. Be Yourself
Don’t compare yourself with others. God made you to be you. Who are YOU? Let’s face you aren’t like everyone else. You are different, set apart, quirky, and obsessed with God. So just be you. Don’t surrender who God made you to be so that you can be who God didn’t make you to be.
2. Accept The Fact That Everyone Will Not Like You
One of the quickest ways to wear yourself out is trying to get everyone to like you. We just have to swallow the fact that some people won’t like us.
You won’t be best friends with everyone. You will be misunderstood, have enemies, disappoint others, and face criticism and judgement. But don’t let people become too big and god become too small. We cannot please everybody but we CAN please God.
3. Speak Up
Be honest. Express your feelings. Confront people when you are angry or bitter. Communicate clearly, respectfully and politely, but confidently.
I used to be so afraid of confronting people or disagreeing with others. I’m come to realize that disagreements are inevitable and as long as I remain humble, teachable, and willing to talk then I’m good. I can still love and accept people that strongly disagree with me. Wow! So profound isn’t it?
My advice is to think of one person that you need to have a conversation with and do within a week.
4. Just Say “NO!”
You are not a slave! Some of you are saying yes to everyone and you think you are being so kind but your “acts of kindness” are based out of fear and guilt, not kindness. I bet most of you have a “to do” list. Some of us need to make a “stop doing” list.
People pleasers get burned out a lot. They say yes to a lot of people. And as they say yes to each person, a subconscious anger builds but they don’t really recognize it. They feel angry at people pressuring them but in all reality it’s their fault for allowing that pressure to disturb them.
You ever complained about something that you agreed to do?…I have. People pleasers are silently angry but they keep saying yes.
Let’s only live for God’s approval. Don’t be a puppet.
